Eyes - Back - Friends

My eyes hurt! :( Stupid pink eye. The drops are working ok. They sting a little. Especially the left eye where it's the most sore. I have to stay off work today and then I am ok to go back on Monday - you know...don't spread it around to the kids who gave it to ME. LOL! :) I think it's only fair if they should be exposed as much I am...right? No? OH...ok. hahaha

I'm glad we caught it pretty early. But being on steroids can decrease the healing time, so it may take a little bit longer for it to go away. DANG! That sucks. And now my back is hurting, too. I have rubbed on an obscene amount of tiger balm, slept with the heating pad, done some stretching and yoga and PT exercises, but to no avail. It's unusual in that the pain is on the right side...someplace I haven't had any pain really since my surgery. It's always my left side. So, I am hoping it's just a fluky thing and not a worsening of the discs rupturing. Bad karma coming back. I know.

I am going to get away for a day or two...help clear my head some. I'll be off line for that time. I am going to be fine, so don't worry. Hopefully I'll come back to Austin and be better able to make some important decisions (although, the doctor does not want me making and major decisions right now - so we'll say "important" rather than "major") that have to be made pretty soon. I already know the answers, I think. I'd just like to have a clearer head about them and being in the big middle of it all is not conducive to that. I don't know for sure what the future will bring. Most of my life changing events have been ushered in with me kicking and screaming "NOOOOO!!!!" but have turned out for the best.

Life works out the way it's supposed to. It always does. It's how I choose to be happy or sad or guilty or depressed or fearful or angry about it that make the difference. I am working really hard on being happy, which is an uphill battle for me...it always has been....especially when you are scared of everything. Inappropriately scared. But knowing that I have my family and friends (the ones who have decided I am worth keeping around) makes my life so much more tolerable. I love you very much.

And thank you for being there for me. Thank you for supporting me even though you don't like my actions or understand what I'm going through mentally/emotionally. Thank you for being a listening ear and a shoulder to cry on many more times than I can count or I have done for you. Your patience with me teaches me new lessons about love and understanding and selflessness. Thank you.

Now I have to go reapply my eye drops. I won't be answering my phone this weekend either, but you can leave me a message here, on my regular email or my myspace email or on my voicemail. If it's an emergency, of course, I'll get right back to you! I STILL LOVE YOU ALL! :)

I'll be home Saturday or Sunday.

Namaste